Call Me “Tisha”
I am grateful to be ambitious and for every step I take towards achieving my goals. I am grateful for the understanding that the only thing holding me back is me.
While I’ve always dreamed BIG and had high hopes for my life, for a long time I was in the habit of making excuses as to why I wasn’t where I wanted to be. “Not enough money.” “Not educated enough.” “Not enough support.” “Not enough clients/customers.” Excuse, after excuse, after excuse. I had a habit of pointing my fingers at everyone else, because I truly believed I didn’t need to blame myself. I made myself the victim. But as you may have already realized, it was because of me. As long as I was making excuses, I didn’t have to make progress. I was allowed to keep dreaming and telling the world all the reasons why my dreams weren’t coming to fruition. Looking back on it now, I know that I was afraid to succeed. If I succeeded, then I could no longer make excuses for myself and for my missteps. If I was successful at fulfilling my desires, then I would also be responsible for my failures. I allowed myself to be naïve, however, this didn’t last forever. People began to see my truth and even call me out on it. So something had to give. I needed to change and I did! With the help of some fantastic books and the content of some inspirational life coaches (Les Brown, Lisa Nichols, Mel Robbins, Jack Canfield and so many more), I finally realized what the problems were and what I would have to do to resolve them.
Hold myself accountable
Be honest with myself and everyone else
Take action
Stay focused
Accountability: I am responsible for where I am in my life today. All of my past choices have led me to this exact point in my life. If I’m unhappy with that, I need to start making better decisions ASAP. If things don’t go as I planned, I need to stop, reflect and adjust. Will that change things immediately? Maybe not, however it will set things in motion for a better tomorrow.
Honesty: There’s no reason for me to lie to anyone but especially not to myself. I can only be who I am, no one else. While I’m fascinated by others, their personalities, their culture, and their accomplishments, pretending to be them and faking their life experiences is absurd. That whole “fake it till you make it” mentality feels like pure deception that will only lead me to more unhappiness. It’s better that I work towards my goals and fail rather than make it only for people to find out that I’m fake. Sure it may take longer, but at least it will be genuine. I also find liberation in being honest. I’m not forced to tell a lie to cover up another lie. There’s freedom in the truth.
Action: Do the work! Nothing worth having comes without some sweat. I have to state my desires then immediately take one action step towards that goal. And then another. And another. Taking action attracts more of the same therefore, I have to keep taking steps, keep having the experiences and keep learning the necessary lessons along the journey. That’s what will make obtaining my goals worth it in the end. Every step forward is a closer step to winning!
Focus: Being a dreamer means, for me, having many dreams, many goals, many aspirations. There’s always so much that I want to do and accomplish. And I believe that I can do them all. Truth is (Honestly) I have a hard time focusing my attention on only one thing. As a result, I’ve started many things but have yet to accomplish most. This is where I need to do the most work on myself. Setting “A” goal (singular - 1) and taking Actiontowards It. Once I’ve completed the goal, then and only then should I move on to something else.
In the past when something became difficult for me, I moved on to a different project telling myself “I’ll get back to that”. Truth is I rarely did. Moving on to a new project, for me, normally means saying goodbye to the last o. Growing up, there was no emphasis on finishing what I started. If something proved to be difficult, then I didn’t do it and I moved on to something else. This bad habit stayed with me for the majority of my early life.
Things are different for me now. While I’m far from perfect at it, I’ve learned the importance of completing my projects. Also, I’m teaching my boys the importance of finishing what they start. I’ve trained myself to start small and complete little tasks. Things like reading a book from start to finish even if I am not a huge fan of what the author has written. Also, writing in a journal daily from start to finish without removing any pages. This is a big one for me! I am the owner and creator of so many incomplete journals, it’s ridiculous. I love to write, I write daily. However, I’ve been known to just pick up any notebook and start writing, leaving my thoughts scattered across many different books. However, in recent years I’ve taught myself how to keep my journal(s) with me and to concentrate my thoughts into those books. I’m happy to report that in the past 4-5 years I’ve gotten much better at sticking to specific books and I’ve completed many journals. If I continue with this practice soon, I’ll be able to Focus on, and complete larger projects.
I continue to be a work in progress. I am grateful to the people and resources available to me along this journey. I am grateful for the determination to be successful and I am grateful for getting out of my own way.
